I had a ten second dance “party” today. It may have lasted longer than ten seconds, but I am sick, and I ran out of energy quickly. I also can’t dance. The “party” included me, and some punk ska music from my teenage years of which most people have never heard. I kept on thinking about this Dayz Wage song as I thought about how many people try to live their life to please God, and yet fail over and over. I was thinking about it today how some people’s sins are far more obvious. I like Dayz Wage because they don’t pretend to be perfect. It is pretty easy for me to pretend to be perfect. I can keep my faults hidden. But I am so far from perfect. I think hiding them though really accomplishes nothing. It also makes those who cannot hid their wrongdoings feel excluded. It becomes easy for them to feel like everyone else has it all together and that they are the only ones struggling. I struggle. I don't love God with my whole heart mind soul and strength. I don't love my neighbour as myself. That is what is most important, yet we are all to quick to judge the outward faults that can easily be seen.

Regular Kid –Dayz Wage

I’m just a regular kid I don’t know why
God there is so much is between you and I
I know that you know my heart and you’ve been in my place
I know you can help me start to see you face to face

God I love your forgiving nature
And I need your eternal power
Jesus Christ is the risen saviour
Praise his holy name forever.

I’m just a regular kid I don’t know why
God there is so much is between you and I
God if you want me I’m yours I don’t know why you would
Without you I’m weak and I’m poor but you can use me for good

A Lesson From Snow

It was snowing again this morning, and I am still enjoying the snow. As I sat by the window and watched it fall, I realised why I like it so much. Without the snow, everything is dirty and yucky. The snow covers that up, it makes it beautiful. I watched as the snow covered the dead leaves on our deck, It makes it beautiful, but I know it will melt and the dirtiness will still be there. In the end, the snow doesn’t stay forever; the dirt has to be dealt with. The dirt doesn’t stay forever either. Transformation happens. Spring comes, but first the snow has to melt. First it has to get ugly. I started thinking introspectively. What am I trying to keep covered with snow? What is ugly that needs to be transformed? There are a couple people at work who I don’t really like. I can cover that up, and get along with them, for the most part, but sometimes my frustration towards them comes out. I don’t want to try to hide this. I don’t want to try to be nice. I don’t want to pretend. I want to be transformed. I want to love them as God loves them. I don’t know how this transformation will happen, but I know that I am not capable of bringing it about by myself, so I pray that God will change me. But I am afraid that first it might get ugly.

SNOW!!!

I heard yesterday that it would snow overnight. I dreamed last night that it did not snow, and that made me sad. When I woke up this morning, I did not have that much motivation to get out of bed. Then I looked out my window and this is what I saw! SNOW! I love snow. I don't think most people were as excited about it as I was. But I have not had to much of winter yet. A lot of the snow has melted now. I hope it snows again in May!

Always winter, never Christmas

Narnia is under a curse. It is always winter, and never Christmas. In the past few days, Narnia has been on our mind. I’ve been asked if I have seen Mr. Tumnus or the lamp post. It’s snowing. Since last night we’ve had about 6 inches and counting. But, it is beautiful. Rachel was over today. As she left my house, I watched the contrast of her black skirt and jacket as she walked into the white surroundings. Narnia. Always winter, but never Christmas.

Lucy and Edmund both go into the wardrobe. Once in Narnia Lucy meets Mr. Tumnus. He has given himself over in service to the White Witch, but upon meeting Lucy, he is able to see through the deception. Edmund, however, meets the terrifying White Witch herself. She chooses against killing him, but decides to use him for his own purpose. With her cunning ways, she wins him over to her side. She offers him enchanted Turkish Delight, and after tasting it, he will do anything to have more of it. Yet she tells him to work in secret, and not to believe any lies that he may hear from Lucy about her.

Edmund dismisses the warnings about the White Witch not because he doesn’t think that she may be dangerous, but because he longs for more Turkish Delight. When the Children all come to Narnia together, Edmund leaves his siblings to go find the White Witch. She is displeased that he has come alone, and keeps him locked up.
Always winter but never Christmas, and he is trapped in the Witches lonely cell.
Always winter, but then something happens. Some of the snow starts melting. A river starts to flow. Farther Christmas comes, and so does Aslan.

I am waiting for spring. I am waiting for Christmas. I am waiting for the curse to be broken, for flowers to grow, I am waiting for Aslan to show up.

Rachel is also waiting for spring. She isn’t pleased by the snow which keeps falling, and she thinks of moving away to escape it all. I don’t know that that would make her content. She is waiting for spring, but before spring comes Christmas, and with Christmas, Aslan comes.

Spring

I love Spring, and today is Spring. The snow is melting, the sun is shining and it is beautiful. I went for a walk, and just watched the waters flow. I could do that for hours.
I love the sound, and it is a picture of hope. As I was out there I thought of a poem (which would be a song if I was musical) which I wrote 4 years ago. I think I wrote it in the spring.

You send snow down
Like wool to the earth
You send snow down
And Lord, it’s cold
You send snow down
Chunks of ice
You send snow down
Frost that bites

Who can stand?
You send snow down.
Who can stand
Your icy blasts?
Who can stand
Against your order?
Who can stand
Against your hand?

You send order
Unto this earth
You send order
And Lord it hurts
You send order
Against this land
You send order
Lord give me your hand

Who can stand?
You send order.
Who can stand
Against your plan?
Who can stand
Against your order?
Who can stand
Against your hand?

Send your breath Lord, take my hand
Send your breeze and help me stand
Say a word and all will melt
At your breath the waters flow
Waters flow again
Waters flow.

See Psalm 147

My religion is loving Mormons

They say that whatever gets you out of bed in the morning is your religion. This morning I knew that I could sleep an hour longer, but I chose to get up so that I could have Elroy, a Latter-day Saint, as my bus driver. I knew when his bus came, and I got on it. It is an 11 minute bus ride from my house to the office, but to me those 11 minutes were worth an hour of sleep. We talked about jazz, a lot about jazz, and about not too much more than jazz. He told me that he had been doing a lot of snow removal in the past week, and we talked about the radio, and then about jazz.

My world is shattered - DC Talk lied to me...

"Boom! Burn! Bip! Yeah! Pow! Hey, ha ha.
Down with the dc Talk, d- d- down with the dc Talk
Are you down with the dc Talk,
d- d- down with the dc Talk
Pullin' out my big black book
Cause when I need a word defined that's where I look
So I move to the L's quick, fast, in a hurry
Threw on my specs, thought my vision was blurry
I looked again but to my dismay
It was black and white with no room for grey
Ya see, a big "V" stood beyond my word
And yo that's when it hit me, that luv is a verb"

So, love is a verb. That sounds right, an action word. something we should do. But today I learned that it is more than a verb. It is not so black and white. Love can be a noun... a NOUN, imagine that?!?! This changes everything!!!! I am not exactly sure how yet.